Reflection from Henri Nouwen

I have asked that question and posed this theory, that if I can live for myself, I would, because I am ultimately the master of my life.
Yet my statement has backfired when I made decisions which did not work very well and almost wrecked my life.
I then went to the Word today and read this passage by catholic theologian Henri Nouwen, he said that unless a person "has totally withdrawn from the world, our life will be a window for other people."
He also said that "[one person's faithfulness [is another person's] hope."
I was challenged in my belief, I thought for a long time, that as long as I don't harm anyone as I do my thing, I'll be fine, and if others find it a problem, who cares?
But in reality, I am deceived, my words and actions, no matter how small it seems, does make a ripple.
If I become sour in my face when I react to an officemates' remark, it is my right to express, but it creates a dent in my personality and character. And though my trap is shut, the other person has already read my expression quite well. If I don't say something good, encouraging , comforting and uplifting to someone who needs it, because I was preoccupied, it might not be a sin, and I have every right to ignore the other person, but it doesnt give credence to Christian compassion and sensitivity.
My very existence in church, in work and at home, how I move, how I eat, drink and rest, already says a lot to the people I am with, positive and negative.
Now, as I reflected, I realized, I am so guilty of many inappropriate actions and words carelessly thrown out, and if people look into my windows, do they see good breeding, a good family name, and a Christian, or is it "he is just like the rest of the hypocrites I see..."

Jesus preached about the be-attitudes and one of them is "Blessed are those who hunder and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled."

I have become complacent and assume, since I am a nice guy, I am ok with everybody, and if someone opposes it, then s___ them. I am not really so nice after all, because I tend to do what I insist, and how I feel I show it even to someone I am supposed to love and care about a lot.

I have been a dirty window and a showcase of shame a lot of times.

the reflection ends saying "those who live for peace and righteousness, while they may not achieve a better world, at least live as windows of the fact that such a world ought to be."